I seem to have whizzed through a handful of books in the last few weeks, including Madonna: An Intimate Biography (J. Randy Taraborrelli, 2002) which does what it says on the cover, up to the Drowned World tour in 2002 anyway. With Madonna's MDNA proving to be all kinds of danceable I decided to finally pull this book off the shelf before it got even more out of date (I was hoping the library would have the more up-to-date edition, but sadly not) and find out a bit more about the Queen of Pop. Taraborrelli seems to have had excellent access to friends and family, as well as having a healthy regard for the successes and failures that Madonna has experienced in the worlds of music and movies in her life. My over-whelming impression was that she was a bit of a bitch with a single-minded desire for success and infamy, but that a lot of the bluster of Madonna comes from her experiences as a child, losing her mother young and seeing her father remarry. Reading about Madonna's life gave me a greater understanding of some of her lyrics, why she went in certain directions, and how hard it must be for a man to be in a relationship with her. The biography was an easy, enlightening read, full of gossip and intrigue but without being salacious or tawdry.
Slightly different non-fiction, but I suppose still dealing with a mythical creature, The Natural History of Unicorns (Chris Lavers, 2009) was the very first book I've taken out of a (public) library. It caught my eye as I browsed the shelves as it seemed like such an odd concept that I had to know more. Lavers traces the history of the unicorn in ancient texts from disparate parts of the world, through representations in the Bible and Christianity, to treks into Africa to hunt the fabled one-horned creature. In trying to uncover the real life animals that prompted belief in the unicorn, and the mystical attributes given to 'alicorn', the name given to the horn and the substane it is made from, Lavers provides a natural history of the narwhal, the okapi and various antelope and goats that could have inspired the myths. While on occasion the text seemed to veer too far away from unicorns in parsing ancient bits of writing, Lavers creates convincing arguments to point to how unicorns were/are real, they are just amalgamations of living animals combined with the desire and belief of humans that such a divine being can exist.
On the fiction front I polished off Buried (Mark Billingham, 2006), in which DI Thorne, who I haven't caught up with in a while, investigates a kidnapping in his own inimitable, realistic and humorous style; and Murder Suicide (Keith Ablow, 2004) which sees forensic psychologist Frank Clevenger trying to understand whether a brilliant inventor committed suicide days before life-changing surgery, or whether he was murdered by one of the many suspects in his life. Thorne and Clevenger are typical crime heroes in that they are somewhat maverick-style loners with flaws, yet Billingham and Ablow steer clear of cliché with tightly plotted mysteries that are all about character and character development of their leads. So Thorne continues to grapple with the death of his father a couple of books ago, while Clevenger has an adopted teenage son to mentor and protect. Billingham and Ablow are writers I am always happy to come back to.
In a break away from detective fiction I took another long-term resident from the book shelf and 
finally cracked the front page on The Princess Bride (William Goldman, 1973/99). I had seen the movie version some time ago and must admit that I didn't really get it, so I was intrigued by what the book would be. It's an oddity. Goldman is supposedly so enamoured with a book that his grandfather read to him as a sick child, written by S. Morgenstern of Florin, a country supposedly existing in Northern Europe, and so he sets out to translate an English abridgement for his own son. Thus Goldman and his 'family' are characters in the background of the telling of the tale of Princess Buttercup, her suitor Wesley, evil Prince Humperdinck, giant Fezzik and swordsman Inigo Montoya, and Goldman regularly breaks into the story to explain parts, tell you what he cut from the Morgenstern text and to reassure the reader when it looks like a favourite character may die. It's a tricky way to write a book, and I'm not sure I really bought it and the reasons for it. It is funny in the parody aspect of fairy tale heroes and adventurous derring do, and the plot is engaging and warm hearted, I just can't help but feel that perhaps it doesn't have quite enough bite to really work as a spoof.
My second library loan was Remembrance of Things I Forgot (Bob Smith, 2011), a book that has rattled around in my mind for days after reading. The premise is fantastic - John Sherkston plans to break up with his boyfriend, who has just invented a time machine for the US Government in 2006, when evil Vice President Dick Cheney hits a switch and sends John back to 1986, where he teams up with his young self and young future-boyfriend to try and prevent his sister from killing herself in 15 years, as well as to prevent George W. Bush from becoming President and screwing the country. How could this set up not reap huge rewards? And it truly does, for the most part. Smith has a fantastically ascerbic wit that had me really laughing out loud, and the time travel plotting is intricate and well constructed, full of what ifs and ponderous questions like, if you could go back and time and change something, would you. Nowhere is this question better explored than in John's attempts to save his father from drinking himself to death, and his sister from shooting herself - his interactions with his family as a middle-aged man are touchingly portrayed, adding much depth and emotional heft to the novel. Initially, the idea of an evil Cheney running around 1986 trying to stop John from changing the future is hilarious and the liberal bias of the character and writer is screamingly clear. Unfortunately, I found the continued attacks on Cheney and Bush became wearying and a little repetitive, and the characters' plans to frame Bush in a sex scandal thereby preventing his presidency is funny but on occasion the barbs are just out right nasty. I mean, I understand that their time in office wasn't the best - yes there were wars, people died - but they were not super villains without conscience (or Syria's Assad). Luckily things get back on track by the end of the book and the bad taste doesn't linger as long as the exciting ideas thrown up by the time travel plot - chief of which involves the confusing sexual attraction between John and his 26 year old self ('Junior'), a quirk that wouldn't have been possible had the lead been heterosexual, and a very enticing quandry it is at that.
58. Die Another Day (2002) Madonna's Bond theme. This divided many people, but I personally think it's not just a great Madonna track, but a worthy addition to the modern Bond universe. The video features a brutal Madonna dancing and being tortured in the same way as 007 is at the beginning of the movie. And then she's fencing with herself, again in a nod to her cameo in Die Another Day. The gritty look suits Madonna here, and the fencing scenes are an improvement on her wooden turn in the movie proper. Why is it she acts perfectly well in music videos, but then comes a cropper with actual dialogue. I like the Bond references in the end of the video - Oddjob, Blofeld's cat, Ursula Andress' bikini, the woman painted gold. A very cinematic video is a hit with me! #3
59. American Life* (2003) The original video was deemed too controversial by Madonna herself and replaced with a less exciting one, but neither appears on the Celebration collection. Version 1: Hot male models on a catwalk are dressed in combat fatigues (there are some female models too). Madonna is also dressed in an army uniform, and backed by explosions. Then Madonna and her models go a bit mental in toilet cubicles. A young (Iraqi?) boy and women then parade on the catwalk, as the video intercuts images of modern warfare. The video is a lot more direct in its message than the song. Madonna's (in)famous rap is performed while she dances on the catwalk in a camouflaged vehicle, and in front of the stars and stripes. A George Bush lookalike catches the grenade thrown by our heroine at the end, and lights his cigar with it - it's a lighter! Madonna is very angry in this version of the video, and you can see why she withdrew it - it's not very patriotic for the young American men and women giving their lives in the war, whatever her feelings about the legitimacy of it. Version 2: Madonna is still wearing the uniform from the first version, and singing directly into the camera, but there are no catwalks, no images of warfare, just the flags of many nations in the background. This video is odd because the song is about American Life and the video has national flags of (possibly) every country. It's obvious there's supposed to be a message here, but it was a lot more explicit in the first version. If it wasn't for the editing, this would be quite a boring video. #2
60. Hollywood (2003) Another comment on the state of America, this time celebrity is in the firing line. A dark haired, almost unrecognisible Madonna is writing while on the phone, and then she's flame haired, dancing on the bed, and then blond and stroking a chair... Oh look, she's straddling a TV that appears to be playing a bit of an old video from the Erotica/Sex book era. Lovely scenes of Madonna being injected with Botox, before she exercises on a big inflatable ball. I'm amazed how different Madonna looks with just a different hair colour. I love the song, so very electro, and the video is wonderfully colourful, and leads to a great ending where Madonna just pulls the plug on the TV. #2
61. Love Profusion (2003) The final single from American Life - I didn't even know it was released! Judging by the chart position, neither did many other people. The video has Madonna looking her age, rather than bending her legs behind her bed, with natural hair and a sensible flowery dress. She's walking the whole time as the scenery changes around her - she's walking through a city, and then along a bit of beach inbetween some CGI flowers, until she begins to crawl and then life in the ocean with some fish... Walking again, this time on petals, as the ocean is above her, and the sky below - it all looks like a relaxing screensaver. It's an unassuming song with a video to match. No controversy or social commentary here. Unless you think that fairies are controversial... #11
62. Hung Up (2005) And we're now at the Confessions on a Dancefloor era, and the amazing Abba-sampling Hung Up. With this video Madonna decides we've not seen enough of the things her body can do, so she shows off a bit. While she's contorting herself and thrusting her crotch about in a dance studio, we also get to see people travelling in a taxi, employees in a takeaway dance, and... I'm confused about the locations. I was sure it was set in America at the beginning, but then there's a black London cab, and the tube. There's a raw, urban feel to the outdoor scenes anyway. Then Madonna's dancing in a back alley, before busting some moves on a dance machine. It's fantastic to see and hear a Madonna track that's just all about getting up and dancing. #1
63. Sorry (2005) Beginning with Madonna saying sorry in myriad languages in front of pink lights, the video continues where Hung Up left off, as Madonna leaves the club she was in with ger girl friends. They jump into the back of a white van and Madonna changes into a sparkly silver outfit, once more with her legs very much on show. Driving around, Madonna and co stop to pick up random people from the streets, including a big fatty man, and a topless body-builder. The van lets it's passengers out at a caged dance-area where Madonna and her posse show a group of black dancers how to put your leg behind your head before they move on the roller disco. Disco balls a-go-go! There's a very retro vibe in the song that is accentuated perfectly with the video. #1
45. You Must Love Me* (1996) The first single to be taken from Evita features clips from the movie musical. It's a few years since I saw it, but I assume the footage in the video is from the appropriate point in the movie. You Must Love Me is a mournful ballad, played over scenes of Eva Peron's illness, with a montage of clips from Eva's happier times. #10
46. Don't Cry for Me Argentina* (1996) A classic song, it's strange that it wasn't the first single from the album/movie. Madonna's version is brilliant, though not as haunting as Sinead O'Connor's. Again, as with the other Evita singles, the music video shows footage of the movie. I like Madonna in this movie, it suits her since she doesn't have to act, just sing and perform. Such a contrast to the Bedtime Stories and Erotica era that preceded it. #3
47. Another Suitcase in Another Hall* (1997) A third ballad from Evita - why not the upbeat Buenos Aires? More clips from the movie. I want to watch it again! #7
48. Frozen (1998) And we finally reach the Ray of Light era, and Frozen, which was the first Madonna track I was aware of, and was completely different to anything that came before. This and The Immaculate Collection introduced me to Madonna when I was a teenager, and I've not looked back! In this video, Madonna is clad in a long, black dress, with long, black tresses. Several of these Madonna's dance ethereally on a beach/desert/quarry/scorched earth? as black crows, dogs and horses are conjured from the air. The video perfectly suits the laid back vocals. Madonna is really toned down in both her style of singing and in the video. I'd go so far as to say that this is my all-time favourite Madonna track, and one of the best videos to accompany it. #1
49. Ray of Light (1998) A more upbeat single, and a much more frenetic video! Madonna's back to a familiar blonde (though not platinum!) and superimposed over scenes of a life in a city, played at double speed, as time-lapse footage. The video showcases a more grown-up Madonna, not flashing her bits or generating controversy, it feels like the music is coming from a new place. Madonna's not even featured in this video that much, there seem to be more scenes of city life. I like the bit towards the end where everything slows down a little and Madonna is not convulsing across the screen, but framed by an orange sunset, until life begins again, at night, and at this point she actually takes part in the city-scenes, dancing manically in the disco. An amazing four minutes, visually and aurally. #2
50. Drowned World/Substitute for Love* (1998) Not a double-A side, but a song with two titles for some reason. This single slows things down a bit, more Frozen than Ray of Light. The video finds Madonna being bundled into a limo amidst baying fans. Hiding behind her hair and sunglasses in the back of the limo, Madonna laments the pressures of fame as paparazzi on motorbikes try to take her photo. Arriving at her venue, she walks alone through the back corridors to a party, which she quickly flees. The video is showing that fame is a substitute for love, until she arrives home to her daughter, at which point Madonna seems happy. Awww. #10
51. The Power of Good-Bye (1998) Black-haired Madonna plays chess with an attractive young man, while also singing in front of a large curtain. The video makes Madonna look strikingly beautiful, maybe it's the brunette look? She soon decides she doesn't like chess, and brushes all the pieces to the floor to kiss her friend instead, which she immediately regrets and goes out on the balcony to think about what she's done. Out she goes to the beach to have a cry, and then it appears that she's killed herself in the surf, but she hasn't really. A gorgeous video, with a song to match. The Ray of Light era continues to impress. #6
52. Nothing Really Matters* (1999) The final single from Ray of Light, and the video is in a much more surreal vein to the singles that preceded it. Madonna is almost unrecognisable in white face makeup, with a red stripe across her eyes, dressed in a big black bin-bag-kimono. Until the track speeds up, and she's in a red kimono, getting a bit frantic in a corridor, while white-faced Japanese characters in robes go a bit mental. Madonna's not done anything this weird since the Bedtime Stories era. It does seem to fit the music though, if not the lyrics. #7
53. Beautiful Stranger (1999) Taken from the second Austin Powers movie, the video features Mike Myers prominently. Basil Exposition warns Austin about a woman who has been seducing agents (including 007 and 008), and shows stills of Madonna's previous 'looks', as she's a master of disguise. After the comedy prologue, the song starts and Austin begins his mission as he approaches Madonna, dancing on stage in a club (the muscly arms are here!). This is a much more imaginative way of promoting a movie through a music video, and Mike Myers has a lot of fun with his role. Madonna thrusts her crotch at Austin from the stage, and then in scenes of Austin driving his Shaguar she's thrusting her breasts or bum in his face. Nice. Madonna looks amazing in this video, and the song is fab too. The video ends with Austin telling Madonna that she's 'going the right way for a smack bottom'. Brilliant. #2
54. American Pie (2000) Originally taken from The Next Best Thing soundtrack, and then slapped on the end of the Music album, this is Madonna's 'controversial' cover. I like it, not having heard the original before. Madonna wears blue jeans and a tiara as she dances in front of a large stars and stripes, alongside scenes of American Life (hang on, that's not for a couple of years yet...) and members of the US public (probably) of every size, shape, sexuality, sex, etc. Oh and then Rupert Everett turns up for a cameo, since he's Madonna's co-star in the movie. #1
55. Music (2000) After Austin Powers, Madonna gets down with the youth with a video featuring the comedy-stylings of Ali G. This dates the video a little, and isn't as funny as before, but I do like how Ali G tells Madonna that her babalons look less big than they do the telly... Madonna looks fantastic here, riding around in the back of Ali G's limo in her Music-era hat and bling. I forget how ace this track is! There's a really random animated section in the middle of the video, featuring Madonna knocking over signs of old song-titles. Love it when Ali calls Madonna 'Maradona'. For real. Respec'. Madonna ends up hanging out in a lap-dancing club and taking some of the strippers for a ride in her limo, like some kind of lesbian gangster kingpin. It's a bizarre video for an unusual song. #1
56. Don't Tell Me (2000) Madonna's got her cowboy hat out again for a more conventional track than Music (not much though!). The hat falls off and we discover she's not actually walking down the road, but on a travelator in front of a big screen projection of scenes of the American west. Madonna makes line-dancing look cool, in her jeans and checked shirt - is there anything she can't do?? The video is reminiscent of that for American Pie in it's celebration of American tradition and Madonna's mostly solo performance in front of the camera. #4
57. What It Feels Like for a Girl (2001) The final single from Music, the third to come directly from it - quite a low single count for Madonna! Oh, this is a remixed version of the song! I've never heard this before! I love the album version of this track, so it's odd that she's turned it in to some sort of dance anthem for the video. In the video, a boiler-suit clad Madonna picks up an old lady in her flashy yellow sports car, before proceeding to crash into a car, tazer a man at a cash point, scratch a cop car, pulling a gun on said cops, driving erratically and generally not being very nice. Is the video saying that Madonna would get away with this antisocial behaviour if she wasn't a 'girl'? I'm not sure. She finally wraps a sporty red car around a lamp-post. The Guy Ritchie-directed video is good, but I really do not like what has been done to the song. It's terrible. #7
30. Erotica (1992) A nice and sleazy look to his slice of filth, with voyeurism and SEX the main themes here. S&M eh? You don't see that in many music videos. Hmm, now Madonna is fellating the arm of a puppet... Her Sex book was out around this time - me thinks she was courting controversy again... #3
31. Deeper and Deeper (1992) We continue the sleaze with a video that opens with a guy shouting in a foreign language, before Madonna drives to a 1970's disco. The colourful disco scenes are inter-cut with monochrome scenes of the club's back rooms and the shouting man from the opening. Madonna's now watching a man clad only in tighty-whities and black socks squat on a mattress while she and her friend eat bananas. Now there's a seance, tarot cards, and a pillow fight. I've completely lost the meaning of this video, especially what it has to do with the song, which I do like a lot. #6
32. Bad Girl* (1993) David Fincher's last video so far for Madonna. Christopher Walken's in it! I hope he dances like he does in Weapon of Choice! Madonna appears to be playing a high-powered executive, first at the office and now at a bar, snogging a stranger in lift... Walken's watching her across a swish-looking diner while they smoke. Walken's floating above her bed... he's not dancing there though. Madonna seems to be depressed, drinking on her own and smoking a lot, at least she's covered herself up for this video, and looks quite classy. I think Walken is her guardian angel, or her stalker. It's not clear. Oh, her lover has just killed her, and now she's floating off with Walken. Right. This one has a plot! And it looks just gorgeous, like a mini movie. The song's good, but not as memorable as Erotica or Deeper and Deeper. #10
33. Fever* (1993) As far as I know, this is Madonna's first cover version released as a single. I love the song Fever, whoever's singing it. This is a very colourful video, featuring a red-haired Madonna, along with some naked men and screen-saver-style backgrounds. I particularly like silver Madonna with her forward flowing hair. #6
34. Rain (1993) Fifth single and counting from Erotica, another not-so memorable one. In contrast to the red/orange themed Fever, this one is all about the blue, while Madonna is looking sultry with short cropped hair and a long blue dress. The setting seems to be the Japanese studio where the video is being made. There are recurring uses of water, since this is Rain after all, culminating in Madonna being rained on while she stands over a sea of umbrellas. #7
35. Bye Bye Baby* (1993) This single wasn't released in the UK or USA, but it was in Australia and a few others countries, so there's a video. It's a live version of the song taken from The Girlie Show, featuring Madonna in top hat and tails, dancing with chairs and young ladies in corsets. It's the most interesting live performance-as-music video yet seen from Ms Ciccone.
36. I'll Remember (1994) After the sex-soaked Erotica album, Madonna changed direction with this ballad from the soundtrack to With Honors, it's only to be found on a Madonna album on the Something to Remember collection. She's looking sophisticated in a black dress to match her hair, as we see her in the recording booth, watching clips from the movie as they're projected in the screening room. This is a more imaginative and subtle way of working such clips in to the video than previously seen. I've never seen/heard of With Honors. It looks good though. Madonna's looking great here too. An understated song with a video to match. #7
37. Secret (1994) The first single from Bedtime Stories, it's a more low-key affair than Erotica. Again with the artsy-fartsy black and white, and featuring a predominantly black cast, I think set in Harlem. Madonna is either sat singing Secret with a band in a jazz club, or wandering down the street into the arms of her lover. Not an exciting video. #5
38. Take a Bow (1994) Spanish bullfighting is our theme here, and as the matador prepares, Madonna dresses up too, before caressing the TV as she watches the bullfight. Oh, now she's gone a bit 'Eva Peron' and with black veil in place, takes her seat in the bullring. Meanwhile, TV-watching Madonna is writhing around in ecstasy(?) on her bed. Ah I see, Madonna's been having it off with the matador, but it's all gone wrong for some reason. Anyway, I like the song. #16
39. Bedtime Story (1995) Subject: Ciccone, M. reads the opening shot, as we find Madonna in a futuristic, blue world where she's being created? But then it goes orange and she's singing in front of a massive sunflower. Now she's naked and submerged in water. It all gets very bizarre. Doves are released from her dress, men are dancing in funny big hats, there may be Buddhists around too. It's a great song, and quite obviously co-written by Bjork, I forget which one this is as it doesn't mention Bedtime Story in the chorus. In one of the weirdest bits, one of Madonna's eyes has become a mouth. Odd. #4
40. Human Nature (1995) 'Express yourself, don't repress yourself' - my favourite Bedtime Stories song and the final single from the album. Madonna is in skin-tight PVC, with corn rows in her hair, in a video where everyone wears black against a white background. The look is symmetical and nicely choreographed. A bit erotic and S&M in places, but less so than Erotica. I like the costumes in this, and Madonna's black lipstick. #8
41. I Want You (1995) Curiously, this collaboration with Massive Attack on a Marvin Gaye cover wasn't actually released as a single, but a promo video was shot and included on the Celebration DVD (when many actual releases were not included!). The song was to be the first single from Something to Remember, but You'll See took that honour instead. I honestly don't remember hearing this track before (I really must give Something to Remember another listen). The song is quite slow and the video features Madonna in her bedroom doing little of interest. She still has the nose stud she seemed to acquire around the Bedtime Stories era, thankfully it didn't last much longer, as it does little for her. Not released
42. You'll See (1995) We return to the matador of Take a Bow. Madonna sings with a lush orange background of leaves, before she's on a train that runs past the matador. This is an altogether more melancholy affair than Take a Bow, Madonna is more sad and the matador is angry. I like the colours in this one, mostly oranges, to match our heroine's hair. The affair with Mr Matador is over, leaving him on the shore, watching Madonna's plane fly overhead. #5
43. One More Chance* (1996) No official video for this one, apparently MTV made a video combining those of Rain, You'll See, I Want You and Take a Bow. #11
44. Love Don't Live Here Anymore* (1996) The original release, in Japan only, was in 1986 from the Like a Virgin album. The remixed version was released in the US, Australia and Europe, but not in the UK, in 1996 and was taken from the Something to Remember ballads compilation. I don't remember ever hearing the 1996 remix before, despite owning both versions! It's very slow, with a one-take video, that slowly zooms in on Madonna in the middle of an empty room as she sings in front of and then while caressing a massive pillar. Freudian? A good, simple video. It's a shame this version of the song is so bland and forgettable. Not released in UK
17. Who's That Girl (1987) The eponymous first single from the movie and soundtrack. So there are some movie clips in amongst scenes of Madonna in a trenchcoat and hat that just look bizarre. A nice little piece on animation on a tarot card. Madonna's stolen a key and unlocked a chest containing... another piece of animation of our heroine. I like the song, though I usually get it confused with Eurythmics song of the same name. #1
18. Causing a Commotion* (1987) The video for the second single from Who's That Girl is a live performance from the WTG tour in Italy. This is a better song than the previous one, but the video is unexciting. Early Madonna's tours weren't as spectacular as her more recent stadium-fillers. There are acrobatics, but no pyrotechnics! #4
19. The Look of Love* (1987) A Who's That Girl movie clipfest - there seem to be loads of these for Madonna's '80's videos. One of Madonna's less interesting ballads. #9
20. Like a Prayer (1989) Bring on the controversy! Burning crosses! Black Jesus! Brunette Madonna! Street crime! The interesting thing about watching this video now is that it doesn't seem that controversial - perhaps I'm too hardened to such things, but then again religion isn't my bag, baby, so I'm unlikely to be offended. Although the images in the video are powerful, the message is a bit mixed. The song speaks for itself, a rocky, undisputed classic. #1
21. Express Yourself (1989) The peroxide is back, and the second single from Like a Prayer is a more glossy affair, with topless, muscular hunks, all dripping wet and working out... Needless to say, I like this one! Madonna is looking sleek in a green dress and cradling a cat, like a slim, blonde Blofeld. Now she's dancing sexily in silhouette. Madonna is expressing herself in a suit while she dances in the factory where all the topless men are. Towards the end it's all descending into a collection of confusing scenes, I've lost the thread of the plot. You can tell David Fincher directed this one. #5
22. Cherish (1989) Black and white is the order of the day for this Herb Ritts directed, beach set video. A nice bouncy lyric from Madonna as she lets the sea wash over her, alongside another half-naked collection of men, with a mermaid and a whale thrown in for good measure. I like the simplicity of this one compared to Express Yourself's excesses. #3
23. Oh Father* (1995) Taken from the Like a Prayer album, but released in the UK from the Something to Remember album, this became the 5th release from the former album so I'm including here in the chronology. So to the video - more black and white, it opens to scenes of death and funerals. David Fincher's second Madonna video (of 4) is stylish and complements the dramatic vocals and content of the song perfectly. It 'treats's us to scenes from Madonna's not so happy upbringing with her father along with religious imagery that is more subtle than in Like a Prayer. This is a good video, though the shots of sewn up lips on the body at one point is quite shocking. #16
24. Dear Jessie* (1989) Opening on a brief piece of live action footage of a sleeping child, the final single from Like a Prayer becomes an animated fantasy that follows the lyrics of the song rather sweetly. Madonna appears as a Tinkerbell-style fairy. I always forget about this song, but I do enjoy it, and the video is a lovely compliment to it. The animation styles on show are imaginative and varied, though there is some repetition. #5
25. Vogue (1990) Another classic song, with another classic video, again by Fincher. Taken from the Dick Tracy soundtrack album, I'm Breathless, Vogue doesn't appear in the movie, so thankfully there are no movie clips to be found! A third video without colour, the monochrome suits Madonna's look of the time. Everyone here is suited and booted, whether a boy or a girl. The first Madonna video with a dance routine! The conical bra is on show! Love it. #1
26. Hanky Panky* (1990) The only single taken from the Dick Tracy movie in which Madonna starred, the video is actual taken from the Blonde Ambition tour. A long haired, ponytailed Madonna dances with a hankerchief until Dick Tracy (not Warren Beatty) pops on stage for a boogie. A fun song with an OK video. #2
27. Justify My Love (1990) The first single from The Immaculate Collection, this is a very erotic song, and has a video to match - a signal of her next album's direction perhaps? B&W once more, Madonna breathlessly urges us to kiss her as she does the deed with a lady (!) as a topless Tony Ward watches. The Celebration DVD censors a dominatrix's nipples! Apparently this video was banned by MTV, I can't think why... It's just soft porn, well, mostly. Pure filth. #2
28. Rescue Me* (1991) This took some finding online. It's a collection of clips... of the Who's That Girl live tour, combining 2 of the least interesting forms of video in one package! Madonna's not even performing the song in the video, it's almost like she just released this with no care... #3
29. This Used To Be My Playground* (1992) Released as the theme to the move, A League of Their Own, it turned on a Madonna album in 1995 on Something To Remember. The pages turn on a photo album made up of video footage of Madonna singing in various locations. I was expecting clips of Tom Hanks and Rosie O'Donnell, so this was a nice surprise. Oh wait, I spoke too soon, 3 minutes in and the photos are now clips from the movie, but they don't last long so I'll forgive her. The pages are turning back now, as we move towards the front of the book and away from the guy who was looking at the 'photos'. #3
I recently acquired Madonna's new greatist hits DVD collection, Celebration, which contains most, but not all of her extensive videography. In order to get a complete overview of Madonna's work I'll be watching the DVD in conjunction with her other videos on YouTube, should they be available, and sharing my thoughts on them. Listed below, in order, are the videos and what I think of them (asterisks denote the videos that do not appear on the Celebration DVD, year of release shown in brackets, highest UK chart position in italics at end of review).
1. Everybody* (1982) Madonna's first music video. Not particularly exciting. There're no bendy Madonna moments I've come to know and love from the recent years. The song's not that great either to be fair. A bit lacklustre somehow. Annie's song, Greatest Hit, that samples Everybody is a much better piece of pop. Not released in UK
2. Burning Up (1983) As Andrew says, 'It's already 10 times more exciting than the last one!' A more energetic song gets a more energetic video. A very 80's Madonna dances about in a dark room, before moving to an empty road and prostrating herself (clothed thankfully, this is no Sex book). There are a lot of 'cutting-edge' video effects... Not released in UK
3. Lucky Star (1984) A punk-looking Madonna has a good dance in a bright white room to one of her first hit singles (apparently the video for Holiday, 1984, #2 was so bad it was never released!), and then along come a couple of backing dancers, very infrequently - they might as well not have turned up. #14
4. Borderline (1984) Looks like the budget stretches to a few more extras here. And dancers who last longer than 10 secs of screen time. There's a plot to this one I think, as far as I can gather a photographer spots Madonna on the streets and then takes her back to his studio to take a few arty (i.e. black and white) shots of her. Her new-found fame, on the cover of Gloss, which I assume is about paint, brings her attention from a street kid. This is Madonna in full-on rebellious youth mode. #2
5. Like a Virgin (1984) Madonna is being stalked by a lion in Venice. As you do. I don't remember either of these mentioned in the song! Maybe it's the very first time the lion has touched Venice? It's difficult to watch/listen to this after Moulin Rouge! When she's not being suggestive in a wedding dress on a bed she's gyrating in a gondola. #3
6. Material Girl (1985) Not just a plot, there's a scene with dialogue at the beginning of this one! Then on to Madonna in Marilyn Monroe-mode in an excellent MGM-style musical dance number. I really like this one, and it's a great song. #3
7. Crazy For You (1985) Taken from the Vision Quest soundtrack, this one has clips of the movie throughout, as these sort of things usually do. As usual, they don't add much to the song, just act as promotional material. According to the cast list, Madonna appears in the movie as a club singer, so I'm not sure if her bits of the video are taken straight from Vision Quest or not. Not an exciting one this. But the song's good. #2
8. Angel* (1985) I'm not sure what happened with this one, the video just seems to be clips of her previous videos to one of Madonna's more forgettable early tracks. #5
9. Into The Groove (1985) Another movie-clip montage masquerading as a music video. At least Madonna actually had a starring role in Desperately Seeking Susan and so it feels like a bit less of a clip-fest than Crazy For You. Another fantastic song. #1
10. Dress You Up* (1985) This commits the other sin of music videos besides movie clip-fests, this is a live video taken from Madonna's Virgin Tour. There's something so unimaginative about such videos, and they're often the basis of videos for those singles that are the final release that an artist puts out and can't be bothered with. Oh look this is the last release from Like A Virgin... Yawn. #5
11. Gambler* (1985) The second and final single from the Vision Quest soundtrack, this song doesn't feature on any of Madonna's studio albums or best ofs, either The Immaculate Collection or Celebration. It's a catchy, fun pop song, so I don't know why it doesn't get any attention - alas the video is another collection of movie clips. #4
12. Live To Tell (1986) First single from True Blue, this song and video showcases a more dramatic Madonna, who looks a bit like Evita here in a bit of spooky foreshadowing. What are Sean Penn and Christopher Walken doing in this video? Oh, apparently their promoting their movie, At Close Range. No, me neither. These bits cheapen the rest of the video a bit. An amazing song either way. #2
13. Papa Don't Preach (1986) From the opening of the song I'm expecting a car advert... Madonna's changed her hair, and she's showing us scenes from her life. I think. Interestingly, this video looks like it's made up of film clips starring Madonna, interspersed with the lady herself dancing in the spotlight in a darkened room. It all gets a bit serious towards the end when Madonna tells her papa about her pregnancy. I'm not sure why, she doesn't look like a teenager... #1
14. True Blue (1986) Oh look, it's all blue! Like the song! Madonna and her backing singers/dancers are in a '50's setting, complete with retro diner. Studio based, this one lack the realism of Papa Don't Preach. Oh look, the sun has actually burst out of the sky in the background! Someone's taking the lyrics to this one literally. Andrew can't believe this got to number 1, and it is a bit unlikely off the back of that video. #1
15. Open Your Heart (1986) Out of the studio this time. Now she's gone a bit Liza Minelli - no, wait, the black wig's fallen off. Oh, she's an exotic dancer, being watched by sleazy men. Is Madonna saying you should open you heart rather than your legs? Because she's mostly doing the latter. Maybe she's a lonely stripper who just wants to be loved? Aww, how cockle-warming. Now she's in a suit, dancing with a young boy and cantering off into the sunset with him. Hmmm. #4
16. La Isla Bonita (1987) The fifth and final release from True Blue, this one gets a proper video! As it deserves. I like Madonna's red flamenco dress, but she needs to watch it around all those candles. There are lots of Mexicans (?) dancing outside her window, and Madonna-with-slicked-back-hair is getting tearful in her cold bedroom, while flamenco-Madonna goes out to dance in the street too. Not sure what the message is here, but I enjoyed the song. #1
finally cracked the front page on The Princess Bride (William Goldman, 1973/99). I had seen the movie version some time ago and must admit that I didn't really get it, so I was intrigued by what the book would be. It's an oddity. Goldman is supposedly so enamoured with a book that his grandfather read to him as a sick child, written by S. Morgenstern of Florin, a country supposedly existing in Northern Europe, and so he sets out to translate an English abridgement for his own son. Thus Goldman and his 'family' are characters in the background of the telling of the tale of Princess Buttercup, her suitor Wesley, evil Prince Humperdinck, giant Fezzik and swordsman Inigo Montoya, and Goldman regularly breaks into the story to explain parts, tell you what he cut from the Morgenstern text and to reassure the reader when it looks like a favourite character may die. It's a tricky way to write a book, and I'm not sure I really bought it and the reasons for it. It is funny in the parody aspect of fairy tale heroes and adventurous derring do, and the plot is engaging and warm hearted, I just can't help but feel that perhaps it doesn't have quite enough bite to really work as a spoof. 
